Internet, I have a question for you

So, in typical spring cleaning fashion, I was tidying up my necklaces when I realized that I had a bunch of rings and I never wear them. They’re nice, and I want to, but I also bought/found/otherwise acquired most of them yeeeears ago, and I’ve gained some weight since then, and most of them don’t fit as well as they did. (And being the sort of thing one buys for $10 here or there, it’s not like getting them resized makes any sense). The kicker is that my left hand ring finger is somehow the only finger still slender enough to fit all of them, though my right ring finger is not far behind. So! Seeing as I’m not about to marry my lovely and esteemable gentleman friend any time in the forseeable future (and I’m at an age where a left hand ring finger ring would be miscontrued), the left hand is out. But what about the right hand? I know theoretically the only sort of signaling rings are left hand ring finger and working hand pinky for things like engineering rings, but I have a vague suspicion that a right hand ring finger ring, especially if it’s the only ring I’m wearing, will be misinterpreted as meaning something more than “I like wearing my cheap jewelry occasionally.”

So, internet: is a single right hand ring finger ring going to lead people to think that I’m headed for marriage anymore than being a late twenties lady who’s had a gentleman friend for a while already does? (Which seriously, ugh. Stop making assumptions about what I am and am not going to do with my life, nosybeaks.)

Millie Does Not Need A New Hobby, But She Has One Anyway

So you know how I keep saying/feeling/thinking that I’m a seamstress, when in reality I haven’t sewn a stitch in months? And have a much neglected blog that I keep wanting to write more for, but am apparently very bad a making the time for it? And that whole yoga thing that I used to do but have totally fallen out of practice with (and never really blogged about so of course you don’t know about it)? Well, I now have another entry on the list of Neglected Activities That Millie Likes Very Much But Is Not Good At Making Time For.

Knitting.

You see, my lovely gentleman friend A. went and bought me this for Christmas:

He didn't buy me the mittens themselves, but a knitting kit to make the mittens.

The sounds I made upon opening it were not unlike (very, very loud) hedgehog squeaks.

I have no idea how he came across these, considering he’s not at all of the crafty sort, but you can see why I have to learn how to knit, right? There’s no way I can not make these somewhere down the road, so I need to get started on the road now in the hopes that I’ll be competent enough to make these for next winter.

I’m fortunate in that I know quite a few people who know how to knit, and I suspect several of them would be willing to teach me. But sometimes it’s nice to have videos/books/etc for learning tools too, because I feel considerably better getting surly and cussy at my computer screen than at my friend who’s already doing me a significant favour, and I know full well I will get surly and cussy about this. I’ve been sewing for over ten years and I regularly get surly and cussy about it, even when it’s going well. Plus I’m left-handed, so trying to flip everything mentally so that the mechanism makes sense with respect to how my brain makes sense of the world while learning is… interesting. I’ve tried halfheartedly to learn how to knit before, and it went very poorly, partially for that reason.

I’m under the impression that at least some of the fine and wonderful readers of this blog know how to knit to some degree, so do you know of any good resources for the beginning knitter? Gold stars for any that are left-handed! I’ve signed up at ravelry.com, since I’m under the impression that that’s the thing knitters do, and if you want to look me up I’m milliescientist.

I anticipate much flailing and waving of needles, and a very grouchy Millie. I’ll keep you posted!

Internet, Millie needs some suggestions (and some sleep)

Someone who lives in the apartment above snores very loudly, and the floors are thin enough that it keeps me up at night. I’ve lived in this apartment for two years now, and for the first eight months or so I stuck it out with earplugs and a fan (and a lot of tooth-gritting), but then gave up and moved the bed to the other bedroom (yes, I’m fancy and have a two bedroom apartment). Bliss! No earplugs (which really hurt, make me sleep poorly, and may potentially damage my ears), no fans (which irritates the people who live below me and make me cold), just sleep.

And then last week the snoring moved. I thought maybe they had visitors for Thanksgiving, so I left it be. But it’s continued on, and there’s no snoring in the original bedroom, so it’s clear that someone’s moved. I’m fine with moving my bed back, but I’d rather know for sure before I do it, because moving my bed and rearranging my apartment is a pain, and I’d rather not have to do it every week. So I gather my gumption, and go upstairs to have a conversation I’ve been avoiding for two years now. The lady who answered the door told me, in rather offended terms, that no-one there snores and there’s no issue. And then slammed the door in my face.

So, internet, help me out here. Any suggestions for how to deal with this? I’m leery about moving the bed because I’m sure once I do that it’ll move back to the original room, but you guys, I need some sleep.

In Which Millie Paints an Umbrella and Doesn’t Think it Through

So I bought a better umbrella than the flabby collapsible purse size one that I’ve been slinging for the past year or so, and I got one with stiff arms and a pointy top. You know, a proper umbrella. It’s clear, which is nice for visibility purposes, but it had a border around the bottom of thin zebra-y print black and white, which just did not look right. But it was on sale, and I thought “I’ve got fabric ink at home! No problem”, and after getting it home, promptly painted the zebra print border with plain black ink. It looks miles better now, except I realized after I’d painted the whole thing that screen ink needs to be set with heat, and I’m not sure how hot I can get the umbrella fabric (which is typical umbrella fabric, and feels nylon-y to me). Then I checked the instructions on the ink, and it says don’t use it on nylon. Clearly this needs to be waterproofed before I use it, but I’m a bit stumped. I can try to heat set it, but I’m not convinced it’ll work. I thought about coating it in a good pose of clear nail polish (of which I have lots), but again, not sure of the durability (or the stiffness issue — the fabric needs to bend when the umbrella is collapsed) of it.

So, internet, any bright ideas?

Two Questions for the Internet Brain Trust

1.) How on earth do you avoid getting those tiny little air bubbles in nail polish? I let the polish dry between layers, but maybe just not enough? I’m also Impatient McGee — if that’s the issue, how do I best speed up the drying?

2.) I loooove my short hair, but I looooooved it more when it was slightly longer on the sides, and as such am growing it out. I know there’s no dignified way to grow out a pixie cut, but how do you guys manage it? Head scarves are the obvious answer, but they accuentuate my already tubular head, and that’d clash with my image as an egghead, so you know, that’s out. Headbands are tricky due to glasses wearing. Any bright ideas, or ways around the tubular head or the many things behind the ears?

Millie’s Guide to Dealing with Summer

So, we’re mid-heatwave here in Eastern Canada, and my sympathies to Winnipeg! (Apparently it was almost 50 with humidity yesterday, which is just ludicrous, and makes me glad I didn’t take that summer job there years ago.) Couple that with the fact that I am reliant on public transit (which is not air conditioned here, and so is basically rolling greenhouses filled with sweaty people), and I’ve got a lot of bits and tricks to deal with summer heat. I’ve tried all of these, and they work for me to varying degrees, but, of course, your mileage may vary.

The Standard advice:

• Wear natural fibres. It’s unfathomable to me why anyone would wear polyester in the summer, but it’s one of those things that has to be on the list. I am a big fan of linen, and it stands up well to heat. Cotton is good too.
• Wear light, floaty clothes. Self explanatory.
• Stay hydrated. Everything feels worse when you’re thirsty.
• Leave the cardigan at home. See Katie’s post about this.
• Commuting shoes are great. Switching your shoes at the office/school/etc gives your feet a chance to air out briefly and not be stuck in sweaty shoes all day.
• Relatedly, insoles are your friend.

The Slightly Bizarre But Still Sensible:

• Put your jewelry on at your destination, or leave it off entirely. I always carry my necklace/bracelet/etc in my school bag until I get to school — it’s surprising how much this helps.
• Chill your jewelry just before you head out. If you must wear it, make it cold first. Cold water or the freezer both work, depending on the material.[EDITED TO ADD: Be careful about the freezer, since some set stones may pop loose as their settings contract. Opals should never go in the freezer. I've only done this with glass and plain metal chains, and not for long amounts of time.]
• Don’t underestimate the comfort of a clean pair of underwear. Seriously.
• Slip a strip of cotton under the underwire of your bra. This helps absorb the dreaded underboob sweat, and I find it helps prevent it a bit too. My skin is much more agreeable to having cotton next to it than synthetic bra material.
• Go braless, if possible. It makes a world of difference, and no-one is judging you. I have a few sundresses that are fitted in enough through the top that they give me support, but have a floaty skirt that’s not constricting.
• Use a fan. Sarah when to Spain once, marveled at how the women there would regularly whip fans out of their purse and fan themselves, and kindly brought me back a fan. I figure if it’s good enough for Spanish ladies, it’s good enough for me, even if I’m the only one here who uses one and I’m not nearly elegant enough to pull it off.

The Mystifyingly Effective:

• Shower in the evenings. I have no idea why this works, but it’s incredible how much more easily my body deals with heat and sweat (ie, it doesn’t sweat nearly so much or as quickly) when I shower in the evenings as opposed to first thing in the morning. Maybe it’s something about all the humidity built up by the shower? I don’t know, but it works astoundingly well throughout the day (which is the really bizarre bit — it’s not just in the mornings I notice a difference), and plus it lets me sleep in more. Win win!

Did I miss anything? How do you deal with dressing for summer heat and/or public transit?

Millie’s Words of Wisdom for a Monday Evening

There is little in life that is not substantially improved by wearing international orange coloured underpants.

Ouchie!

heres a question im hoping all you fabulous, resourceful and witty people out there in blog-land can help with… what do you do, oh what do you do?! when after the first day wearing your amazing, new shoes that not only go perfect with everything AND were on sale, have turned your heels the shreds and made your toes file a complaint? and returning them is impossible, and buying new ones are not an option? we’ve all been there i know. im there now, my fabulous new and great shoes (that were to replace my literally falling apart ballerina slippers for some upcoming traveling) have decided to spite me….wtf? i want to show them the world, show them the bright lights of kuala lumpur, and the roadside bus stops of the philippines, but they seem to be protesting. ive tried to ‘work them in’, a few twists and folds, but still issues.

si vous plait, aide moi! any tips, tricks or hints that have helped make your feet and style happy?